Tuesday, December 25, 2007

* Silent Night

Hi,

This has actually been a very pleasant Christmas Eve for a change ! No running to stores, circling parking lots filled with frantic, distracted drivers, no pushing through crowds to find sold out items and empty shelves, no standing in long check out lines, and no late night wrapping sessions. Today, I haven't left the house. (And I haven't had a house full of neighborhood kids either.) Things have been quiet and peaceful - which is VERY unusual.

Jake and Heather have been calm and well behaved; NOT crazed with excitement. I didn't have to force anyone into bed with threats, and I'm starting to suspect that they might wait until the sun comes up to wake me. This year, Jake and Heather's wish lists really weren't that long. Nothing on their lists were what I would consider "toys". I think they have out grown all that. This year, almost everything on their lists were electronics. As a result, the number of gifts have decreased as they've matured. This is the first year that I didn't have to cross the threshold of Toy's R Us ! As I sit here looking at all the larger, more expensive gifts under the tree, It's slowly starting to sink in . . . my babies are not babies anymore ! In alot of very practical ways, it's a good thing. Still, I can't help but feel a little bit sad. There are no sleds, no stuffed animals, no race cars, or dolls, and nothing that they will need me or Roy to figure out how to set up. The only real "toys" that we purchased were for (2 of our 3) grand kids ! Oh. my. God. I think I might cry.
No, I won't. I love my kids just the way they are, at this age, at this moment. They are wonderful, and I am proud of them, and their achievements. This is how it's supposed to be, and it's a good thing. Right ? Somebody. . . please, tell me that I'm right ! I have to stop this train of thought, I'm starting to do mental math. Figuring equations like : I'm 45 years old, my oldest child is almost 30 which means. . . I've been a mom for 66% of my life. . . which is 2/3. . . my youngest child will be graduate in 7 years. . . Thoughts like that aren't good - they never end well.

I know it's crazy, but at least I'm willing to admit it. Roy has spent his whole day being restless and depressed, and he hasn't a clue as to why. I think that he has run to the store at least 6 times, he's been watching sappy Disney Christmas movies all day long, and he's not his usual jolly self. Poor baby, he didn't even eat his peanut-butter cookies and milk before he went to bed. Oh well, maybe I 'll go to bed and see if I can cheer Santa up a bit. . . Ho, ho, ho !

Have a very merry Christmas everyone !

Love,
Susan

1 howled back:

Anonymous said...

that is a gorgeous post and yeah, I think your babies are growing up. I got a sad little text off my cousin saying "this was the strangest christmas in a long time - all my kids have left home and it was so quiet. enjoy the magic you have at home, mel, while they are still young."

I hope Roy woke up happy today and there is that buzz in the house from Christmas morning.

Merry Christmas to you and your family, love ya.

mel xxxx