Thursday, July 30, 2009

School, husbands, birthdays, and rolling in the grass


Hey, it's me.



I can honestly say that this has been a better week. I've been working hard to feel more productive; getting my chores done, and trying to cut back on the kids social calendars, and getting them (and myself) off to bed at a more reasonable hour, in preparation of them going back to school. These things have to tapered back slowly, so that they don't go into shock and withdraw, otherwise, I could end up with a full fledged revolt on my hands.


The past week has been filled with cooler days and I'm finding my husband home more often in the evenings. Now, all I have to do, is try to remember what I'm supposed to do with him. I know that husbands are supposed to be good for something, I'm sure it will come to me eventually. . .


Of course, as the summer winds down there are always things that try to stress me out. The kids are already wanting to know when we will be doing the annual shopping expedition for school clothes and supplies. As much as I look forward to having my days back, I really dread the whole shopping thing. There is always at least one item, that they simply must have, that turns the whole event into a scavenger hunt ! The school is sending out notices for their yearly "Meet and Greet" nights, which is their not-so-subtle way of wasting my time by trying to recruit me for fund raisers, committees, and general worthless programs. Nope, not gonna do it. I did my time at school, and I'm not going to play the same popularity/clique games with grown ups.


PLUS, Yesterday was the official start of the "Birthday Season" for our family. Yup, yesterday, my first born baby girl turned 31 years old. Don't ask me how that happened, I can't believe it myself. Jasmin has her birthday at the end of July; Nick will turn 24 (?!) seven days later, in August. Jacob will turn 15 in September, in addition to my grand daughter celebrating her 9th birthday, we are also expecting our 4th grand child to be born that month. Christian turns 16 in October. (Oh my God, how is that possible?!) Then, in November, Heather will turn thirteen years old - just in time for me to start stressing about Christmas in December !!!

These are the things that I try to keep my mind from dwelling on, so that I don't panic. My sane, rational, mind says, "We go through this every year, Susan. Somehow, someway, it all works out, so quit worrying." Easier said than done, I respond.

When my kids were younger, I used to be the kind of person who made a big deal out of birthdays with parties and plans. Now that my kids are older, my teens (my babies) would just as soon Roy and I just give them their stuff , so they can go hang out with their friends. I'm lucky if they show up for cake and ice cream. Now a days, my oldest daughter has taken over the role of party planner. (and she's good at it too.) Still, it's hard not to get my little brain all wound up with stress when this time of year rolls around.

Lately, I've been working on discovering, and experimenting with, ways to let go of all that tension and anxiety by finding time to do things that relax and please . . . me. Hard to believe that someone can live 47 years without ever knowing what makes them happy, but that's the boat I'm finding myself in recently. Like today, I found myself feeling all flustered and irritated over my car situation. (that situation is getting better, but it's just been one of those days.) I kept thinking to myself, "Okay, one thing at a time. First I'll do this, and get this done, then, I can hook the leashes up to my dogs, and disappear for two or three hours; when I get back, I'll feel much better about everything." And that's what I did. When I got home, I didn't yell at anyone and all was well in my spirit. Even if the weather isn't as beautiful as it was today, my dogs are truly happy just to be out and spending time with me. They aren't complex and complicated creatures, they don't argue and worry, they just enjoy life; and when I take them out, I am THE COOLEST person in the world to them. Their attitude just rubs off on me. I'm finding that it feels good to walk, breathe clean air, look at the clouds, and sometimes, roll in the grass.
*Remember the 1996 movie "Michael"? When the Arc angel Michael (John Travolta) watches Sparky, the dog, rolling around happily in a big field of grass, and he says, with a big smile,
"Ah . . . now that's my nature - I'm a grass roller!"
I know exactly how he feels.

Sunday, July 26, 2009

What's New?

Okay, I know. I haven't blogged in FOREVER. Sorry. Unfortunately, it isn't because much has changed. Well . . . at least nothing drastic, or even too exciting. I'm still bored, except now, I'm becoming lazy too. Oh, well, what are summers for? Let's see here . . . there have been a few things.



Hmmmm . . . Well first of all, my son, Nicko, has been off work this week. They finished the job they were working on and might not have anything new for him until Monday. (He's keeping his fingers crossed) So he's been home all week distracting me from my chores. Not really, I just haven't felt very motivated lately. Actually, he's managed to get a few things done around the house and take care of some Doctor appointments. Recently, he's found out that he has carpal Tunnel in his arms from the work that he does. (It's been really painful for him at night and in the mornings) Also, he got some much needed (and somewhat traumatic) dental work done. He just had a tooth pulled, but it was in the exact spot where his jaw was broke less than a year ago. It had both him, and the dentist, sweating for a while. They got it out, but afterwards, it was pretty painful.



Jen had her baby shower last Sunday, and got lots of lovely things for the baby. She had it at her mother's house and I was a little concerned how that might go, because her parents are just a bit . . . over protective? No . . . more like ANGRY with a touch of crazy thrown in for good measure. I was most worried about her mother making some kind of snide and offensive remarks to me, or someone in my family; but as it turned out, it was her husband that ended up ruining the day, and setting off an ugly exchange of words (via text messages and face book comments) that has lasted all week long. He waited until after everyone had left, and then berated Jen for having "abandoned her family." Just the sort of thing an 8 month pregnant girl needs to hear from her father at her baby shower! Since then, they have shown just how ugly and judgemental they really are. Basically, they have never approved of her relationship with Nick, and have always done everything in their power to break the two of them up. Now that they realise that they really have no control over the situation, they have become desperate enough to try anything - including verbal attacks on our entire family. They just don't seem to realise that they are only pushing Jen farther away. I can understand why they feel as they do (to an extent) but they have an all or nothing attitude about everything. Jen's mother is famous for cutting people (even family members) out of her life when she can't control their behavior. It's very sad.



Again this week, my husband has been so busy at work, I only get to see him about 10 minutes a day - at least while he's still awake. In fact, I had a few appointments this week that I had to have the car for, so rather than give Roy the time off so I could use the car, his boss has decided to loan me one of his cars to take care of my business until they can find a truck for Roy to work out of. So, I still don't have MY car, but I have A car, which is better than nothing.



Jake has spent most of this week helping dad to do some side work to earn some money. His girlfriend's birthday was today and he wanted to give her something nice. I'm starting to worry about this relationship. The two of them have been together almost 9 months now. For teenagers their age, that's an ETERNITY ! I have to watch the two of them all the time. It's a good thing that her parents have made a rule about her only being able to spend every other day with Jake. On their days apart, they have to hang out with other friends. (even though they text each other 24/7.) Still, she's enough of a regular around here, that Heather and I made her dinner and baked her a birthday cake Friday night to celebrate. She is a really sweet girl, I just worry about how Jake will take it if they ever break up.



Speaking of break ups, Heather's "boy friend" broke up with her last night. He's the first boy that she has ever really liked. Heather used to be a very emotional, drama queen, kind of girl. (especially when she was younger) So I was really worried how she would handle it. At first, she was upset, but she didn't go overboard as I was concerned about her doing; She was pretty much over all the drama by this evening. That seems to be a fairly age appropriate response, so I was actually a little surprised. I think it really helped her to know that her big brothers were there for her. They both love her very much and made a special point of telling her today. They even offered to beat up - or publicly humiliate - her ex-boyfriend for her. That made her smile and giggle a bit. I know that it still stings a bit, (she and I are pretty close and we've talked about it a couple of times today) but over all, I think she's okay with it. She has really matured so much over the past couple of years. I'm very proud of her. I think that the next big hurdle with her is going to be her weight. It's something that she has always been sensitive about and I just have to make sure she deals with it in a realistic and sensible way. She has a tendency to want quick fixes for everything - she has already started looking at diet pills and miracle drugs on the Internet. It's always something.



As far as the other, four legged, members of my family go . . . Well, I'm back down to just five, instead of six. Roy found a nice home for Princess over the fourth of July weekend. I think she'll do much better there. She'll get plenty of attention, all to herself, and (hopefully) lose weight and become healthier. However, over the past few weeks, we have been having some issues with Pete, the daddy of the pack. Lately, he's become very impatient waiting for his walks. If I don't get him out first thing in the morning, he jumps the fence and takes himself for a walk. He always comes home, but there are just too many things that could happen to him while he's gone. (and I have enough gray hairs without worrying about him) We tried several tricks to keep him in the yard. Finally, Nick thought the solution would be to buy an electric fence kit - against my strong warning NOT to. (I hate those things!) Well, the first zap confused him enough to stop him; the second time, he figured if he was going to get zapped anyway, he'd be on the other side of the fence when it was said and done. So no, it didn't work. Turns out, that sitting on Nick's lap, when Jen drives Nick to work in the early morning, seems to keep him contented enough to wait, until I can get him out for a walk in the afternoon or evening. I don't really understand the dog logic there, but . . . whatever works.



Well, like I said, nothing really exciting, just regular mom stuff, but I guess it has been a busier week than I realised. No wonder I'm so tired!



Good night all,

Love,

Susan

Tuesday, July 21, 2009

I'm a Fig Tree?


I'm not too sure what a Celtic Horoscope is, But I was goofing around on one of my favorite quiz sites (blogthings.com) so I thought I'd give it a try. I'm a fig Tree? Well . . . okay, I think I can live with that.


What's Your Celtic Horoscope?

You Are A Fig Tree.

You are very independent and strong minded.
A hard worker when you want to be, you play hard too.
You are honest and loyal.
You hate contradiction or arguments.
You love life, and you live for your friends, children, and animals.
A great sense of humor, artistic talent, and intelligence are all gifts you possess.

On the other hand . . .

What Frozen Treat Are You?

You Are a Popsicle.
You are colorful, creative, and expressive.
You are often in your own little world, having the time of your life.
People might be surprised to know that you're actually a bit of a perfectionist.
You like things to be neat and orderly.
You can deal with chaos, as long as it's controlled chaos.

I agree with the discription, but I hate popsicles.

Tuesday, July 14, 2009

I have NO life.

I'm so B.O.R.E.D. ! Life around here is dull, dull, dull !!! This summer is turning into a huge disappointment. Roy finally finished putting in the water pump and timing belt on his car yesterday; and the bottom line is . . . his car is screwed. It's got much bigger problems than he first thought and I STILL have no car because he's still driving mine. I had so many plans for this summer to get out and do things with the kids, but none of them have happened because I have no wheels. The kids will be going back to school in just a few weeks, and summer will be over. I am sick of feeling trapped in this house !

Sorry I sound so bitchy and whiney, but I really have nothing else to blog about. This sucks!

Saturday, July 4, 2009

Speed Shopping

Oh my gosh, It's been go, go, go, all day long ! A totally crazy day. I was feeling really a bit yucky on Thursday, so I let my laundry agenda go, thinking that I would catch up today - HA !

I over slept this morning, had to rush around the house to get dressed and to the grocery store, but Heather and a bunch of her friends wanted a ride to the mall first. Car schedules got screwed up, and when it was all said and done, I only had an hour to get my shopping done.

So I drove past the house, picked up my youngest son, Jake and said,
"Here's the plan. We only have an hour to get groceries and get back home and unload everything, so we are going to do something different. We are going to buzz through the isles and randomly throw whatever appeals to us into the cart, and then, rush home as fast as we can. Okay?"

Okay, I know that doesn't make a lot of sense, but most things in my life don't. And Hell, Jake is an easy kind of guy. It was so much fun, and we ended up with some very interesting, and delicious, items. We got a box of creamy banana pop sickles covered in dark chocolate. Oh my Lord ! They're amazing ! We also ended up with several boxes of various fish fillets in Gourmet sauces? (The only time this family eats fish, is when we do take out from Long John Silver's.) But, Jake says he was feeling adventurous. For dinner, we ended up barbecuing a bunch of steak and chicken kabobs because, it was just about the only thing in the bags with any nutritional value. But damn, they were really good! We also got a giant box of microwaveable sausage and Pancakes on a stick, and THREE different flavors of Jello Cheese cake mixes. (cherry cheese cake, Peanut butter cheese cake, and Oreo cookie cheese cake) I guess Jake really likes Cheese cake. After I cleaned up from dinner, I went back to the store to get a list of stuff that Jenn needed to make a special Anniversary dinner for Nick tomorrow. (They have been together for ONE whole year !)

Anyway, while I was there, I picked up the "sane and rational" items that we missed. I didn't get home, get things put away, and actually sit down, until 11PM. I'm completely exhausted. I need to get myself off to bed. Heather and I are going to see Jasmin tomorrow to have our hair done. Urgh, At this rate, I'm never going to finish that laundry.