Sunday, April 26, 2009

It's MEME time! Everyone gather round !

Well, things have been a little dull in my little corner of the blogO'sphere. Nobody is posting much, and I am tired of bitching. (for a while) So I think I will entertain myself by stealing a meme from Kate's blog. (I told you that I would, didn't I?)
So, Here goes . . .

Can you cook?
Can I cook? Well, apparently so, because people keep showing up at my door to be fed. Or . . . it could be that I am just surrounded by ravenous teenagers?

What was your dream growing up?
Well . . . Other than being married to a rock star, I used to dream of becoming a fashion designer. I still love art, however, I have totally and completely fallen out of love with fashion. I wear what I want, when I want, and I think most people in the fashion industry are arrogant buttheads.

What talent do you wish you had?
Um, like Kate, I'd love to be able to sing, but for me, it's only because I am totally tone deaf. What I would really like, is to have enough artistic talent to make a good living with it. (Fame really does not interest me at all.)

Favourite place?
I love to go walking and hiking in the woods with my dogs. I always feel very at peace in nature. However, I really despise snakes, so anywhere that I'm not likely to run into one would be ideal.

Favourite vegetable?
Vegetable? I'm not really sure that I have a "favorite" . . . I feel a deep admiration for the tried and true potato - partly because I am of Irish decent, but mostly for it's versatility. When I cook, I tend to toss a lot of onions and green peppers into my creations. ( Did you know that there is more vitamin C in a green pepper than an orange? - TRUE!) I've always felt a certain attraction to pumpkins, but you know, fresh corn is quite nice too . . . . . What a SILLY question!!!

Last book you read?
I tend to be a binge reader. I will go months without a book, then I will spend twice as many months lost in a reading frenzy. Since life has been kind of chaotic lately, I'm currently having a dry spell, but I think the last book that I read was Breaking Dawn by Stephanie Meyer.

Zodiac sign?
Um, I don't have one. I believe in a lot of fanciful, spiritual, superstitious, mumbo-jumbo, but astrology isn't one of them.

Tattoos/piercings?
I have both my ears pierced, but because my mother didn't want me to be a cheap tramp, I waited until after I had my first out of wedlock child.
I have nothing against tattoos - as a concept. In fact I really admire the artistry that goes into it. My biggest issue with tatts is, in my particular case, I just don't have any part of my body that I feel would benefit from having additional attention drawn to it - But that's just me . . . . So, no. Sorry, no tattoos for this little rebel.

Worst habit?
Oh Gawd! I do SO MANY gross, disgusting, and outrageous things, but I try my best not to make them a habit . . . I guess it would have to be that, in my mind, I am always quick to see the negative aspects in a new situation. Thanks to my impulsive and rebellious multiple personality disorder, I tend to totally disregard my own negativity and eventually, manage to screw up almost every new situation by making irresponsible choices.

Do we know each other outside blogging?
Who exactly is "we?" Is that like the voices in my head, or are "we " talking about a specific person? Isn't blogging how you come to know a person? IF in fact, you really ARE a person?

Favourite sport?
When it comes to sports, I don't play favorites. As a general rule, they all bore me equally.

Negative or positive attitude?
Depends on what day of the month it is, what time of day it might be, who I am with, what kind of issues I might be dealing with, what direction the wind is blowing, whether the moon is rising in Scorpio, or in the sign of Libra, who's asking, and why the hell you need to know!
Here's the thing. I am a woman, and I reserve the right to have any kind of attitude I want, at any given moment. ummkay ?!

What would you do if you were stuck in an elevator?
Okay, well, first of all, I think we need to clarify if it is ME that is stuck in the elevator, or is the elevator stopped between floors?
If it is ME that is too fat to actually exit the elevator; I suppose I would cry, and wait until the fire department showed up with The Jaws of Life to extricate me from such an embarrassing predicament.
If the elevator is stuck between floors, I would follow the ancient instructions on the elevator panel, proforming what ever ritualistic dances and spells are required, then I would stand around bitching about all the time I am wasting. I would hope that I'm not alone, so that I could have someone else to pass the time with. I just pray that it doesn't turn out to be Kate, because she is pretty good at getting me to go along with anything.

Worst thing that's ever happened to you?
The worst things that happen to me, are the things that I don't learn anything from. (you know, stuff like High school.)

One weird fact about you?
Just one? hmmm, I am nocturnal.

Any pets?
Don't be a smart ass.

(yeah, I have six dogs. Every one knows that.)

Do you know how to do the macarena?
I know how to do mascara, and I know how to do Macaroni, I can even tolerate an occasional macadamia, but I WILL NOT do the macarena.
I will not do it in a box,
I will not do it with a fox,
I will not do it here, nor there,
I will not do it anywhere.

What time is it?
Time for YOU to get a watch ! (AR-AR !)
If you really want to know what time it is, just look at the bottom, right hand corner of your computer screen - it's always there . . . .

Clowns, cute or scary?
You know, I've spent many long and sleepless nights, pondering this very question. I have finally concluded that clowns are in fact, drunks in drag. They are neither cute nor scary, they're just sad. People who laugh at them are heartless and cruel - I don't care if they ARE only three years old!!!

If you could change one thing about you, what would it be?
First of all, I resent the fact that this question implies that I CAN'T change anything about me!
That I might not be quite up to the task of self improvement? Is that what you're saying? Huh?
I just don't FEEL LIKE IT right now, that's all . . .
I can change anything about me that I want.
ANY time that I want to do it too. . .
So there!

Would you be my partner in crime or my conscience?
For a worthy cause, yes. I could devote myself to such a noble task. As long as it doesn't involve anything really gross.

Eye colour?
I have lovely, soulful brown eyes. Van Morrison wrote a song about them. True story, honest.

Been arrested?
Yeah, but unfortunately, there isn't a good story to go along with it. I forgot to pay a speeding ticket and they showed up one Saturday morning to drag me down to the police station to make bail, so they could make the maximum, legally allowable, dollar amount off of my stupid mistake. They didn't even put me in a cell. If they had, then I might have gotten a tattoo like Kate, you never know . . .

Favourite fictional character?
Some of my best friends are fictional characters, it's not fair to make me choose.

If you won $10,000 today, what would you do with it?
Just $10,000.00? Sheesh, that wouldn't even pay off what I owe my mother.

If you could have one super power, what would it be?
I'd like to be able to see the future. That would be helpful.

Favourite hangout?
I am 46 years old. I am not allowed to just "hang out", for pity sake.

Do you believe in ghosts?
Absolutely. Dead people need support and encouragement too !!!

Favourite thing to do in your spare time?
I'll let you know just as soon as I get some. (spare time - that's funny . . .)

Do you swear a lot?
I try to avoid using the really bad words. Unless I feel it's absolutely necessary. You know, like a curse word crisis?

Biggest pet peeve?
I told you, I don't have any peeves, I have six dogs !
But I really hate people who are intentionally stupid.

In one word, describe yourself.
Confused.


1 howled back:

sparsely kate said...

Hahah. I had a few good giggles at this...I like your silly moods, you sarcastic thing! funny bugger (that's a term of affection over here, in case you thought I was swearing at you!)

xxx