Monday, August 31, 2009
Posted by Auburn~haired~artist at Monday, August 31, 2009
Wednesday, August 26, 2009
Posted by Auburn~haired~artist at Wednesday, August 26, 2009
Tuesday, August 18, 2009
I've been having a very lazy day today. I have no idea why. I guess the past few weeks have just finally caught up with me. The kids are back in school, Roy survived his back surgery and is recovering - slowly. All the court dates that I was feeling so anxious about have been put off until the first week of October. (Roy on the first, and Nick, on the fifth) Today was a light day for housework, so instead of getting some other things done, I spent my afternoon napping. In spite of the forecast for more rain, it's only been overcast today, and even slightly cool. It would have been a perfect day to get out with the dogs, especially since I've been dodging raindrops for the past three days to get them walked. But no, my body said sleep, so I did. I guess I must have needed it.
The only major event left is for Jen to have that baby, and as we all know, these things can't be rushed. I know that Jen wishes they could be. Poor baby, she's so sick of being pregnant, and I know just how she feels. Still, I'm glad that it's her, instead of me. LOL. I've put in my time of baby making, I've donated 36 months of my life (and body) to the gestation of small people; and, so far, 31 years, to getting them grown. I've still got a minimum of 6 more years to go. I just hope I can hang in there that long. I keep wondering what it will be like to have a baby in the house again. I'm sure it will have it's ups and downs, and it will take time for everyone to adapt, but I think for the most part, everyone is looking forward to it.
Last week, when I was at the Doctor's office, he removed a little "bumpy thing" from my left shoulder. I have no idea what it is except, I've had it forever. I never gave it a second thought until last year, when it started growing and getting sensitive to the touch. I get to go back tomorrow and have the stitches removed. (both of them) He said that he should have the biopsy results back by then, so maybe, I'll find out what it is. (or was)
Since I have spent the biggest part of today being a bum, I've resolved to actually get to work on some projects for our annual Halloween Yard Haunt. (check out the link for Howling Hollow Asylum to the right, to see photos of the past two years) I'm beginning to realise that with the way this year has worked out, I probably won't be able to accomplish as much as I had hoped for this year. In fact, with a new baby at home, I'll be lucky if I get just a few things added. I really wanted to build and paint a mausoleum with a flying crank ghost for this year, but it looks like it will have to wait until next year - again. Finances haven't worked in our favor this year, and I really don't want to feel rushed about getting it done, I really want it to be perfect. (perfectly creepy!) Every year, I tell myself that I am going to start planning and working as soon as spring arrives, but some how, I'm lucky if I get started before September, and usually, I'm still adding touches right up until Halloween. This year, my basement is so crammed full of extra stuff, that I've just been dreading the act of unpacking it all to get started. But I absolutely WILL get started this weekend - NO EXCUSES!
Okay, In spite of all the sleep I've had today, I'm actually yawning. I've been working really hard at getting up early and not wasting my day since the kids have gone back to school. So, I need to get myself off to bed.
Posted by Auburn~haired~artist at Tuesday, August 18, 2009
Sunday, August 16, 2009
He, he, he. It's a little after midnight, and I'm sitting here listening to the silence, and eating a snack of Chicken Fries and Three Cheese Ranch dip. Why is it that food tastes so much better late at night, after everyone else is in bed?
Oh yeah, because I can actually sit here and eat it, instead of guarding my food from passers by who feel obligated to pinch something off my plate everytime I cook something. And I don't have to hear people saying things like,
"Oooh, that looks good! Could you make some for me? Except I want barbeque sauce instead of ranch, and maybe a few french fries, and . . . ."
I doubt that anyone appreciates the joys of solitude quite like a mom does.
Posted by Auburn~haired~artist at Sunday, August 16, 2009
Thursday, August 13, 2009
I really should be in bed right now - I'm exhausted. These past few days have just been an absolute whirlwind. Doctor's appointments for me, the kids, and my husband, and getting the kids together, and back to school. (they both start tomorrow) And just as I suspected, in the midst of all of this, my husband's back surgery was finally scheduled for today. I've spent the whole day at the hospital; sitting, waiting, and worrying. Days like that are more exhausting for me, than a full 16 hours worth of house work and physical labor. I have always preferred "doing," over "sitting and waiting." I'm just not good at it. I always manage to get myself tangled up in knots over all the things that I should, or could, be doing. And of course, doctors and hospitals never run on schedule, all the red tape, and forms to fill out, etc. And worst of all, the stress.
Anyway, all went well with Roy's surgery, and he should be back home tomorrow afternoon. Of course, his back is sore from the surgery, but the pain that he's been dealing with for years - is GONE. So . . . IF I can get him to behave, and follow the doctors instructions, long enough to heal up, he'll be better than new.
I have about a million things to catch up on tomorrow, but I'd really like to take a day off and relax a bit with my husband. (next week is shaping up to be even busier, and Jen is due to deliver that baby any day now.) We'll see how that plan works out - I'm not holding my breath.
Okay, I have to get up early tomorrow, so I need to get to bed. Just wanted to let everyone know that all is well with my hubby. I'll keep you posted.
Posted by Auburn~haired~artist at Thursday, August 13, 2009
Friday, August 7, 2009
Oh my. I woke up this morning feeling SO old. I don't know why, every now and then, I have days like that. I'm not really depressed, I've just felt tired and achey all over, and every little thing seems like such a monumental effort. I don't feel like I've accomplished much of anything today. I had good intentions, I did get a lot of things started, but I just lost momentum somewhere along the line. On the other hand, the fact that I managed to make it this far, without a nap, or just plain giving up, seems pretty amazing, all things considered. I think that at some point in my morning, I just looked around and thought, 'There are FAR too many people in my house, just lounging around.'
It's been that way for the past few days. Nick is struggling to find a new job since he was laid off, and it's just starting to feel like he's given up. I don't want that to sound wrong - he's had a lot to deal with this past week. When he got laid off work, he wrestled with justifying the cost and inconvenience of continuing his methadone treatment. He considered a new, alternate, drug to ease the with draw from the methadone, but ultimately decided to just white knuckle his way through it, and be done with it all as simply, and quickly, as possible. I know that what he is going through right now is difficult; it's really hard to with draw from methadone and focus on anything else at the same time. (least of all, looking for a job) It has all just changed the rhythm of my day at bit, and I'm struggling to regroup.
About the same time, things have slowed down for Roy at work, and he's been at home much more than I, or him, are used to. He's taking advantage of the slow time right now to schedule some surgery on his back. That's a good and positive thing, that I know will help him a lot. (and it's something that has been put on hold for far too long) But dealing with insurance companies and doctors, scheduling all the tests and pre approvals, can be complicated and frustrating, almost a full time task. I know that he's feeling anxious about the surgery, but also trying to remain hopeful about the final outcome. I think that when it's all said and done, he has just been feeling out of his element this past week.
In addition, this is the last week of summer vacation for the kids. I know that this summer hasn't been all that they had hoped for, in fact it's been pretty disappointing for everyone. They seem to be torn between wanting to get back to school and see their friends, and dreading the whole school work thing.
The last time that Jen went to the Doctor, they told her that according to the sonograms, the baby is developed enough that she could deliver anytime between now, and the first week of September. I know she has to feel uncomfortable, as well as nervous and anxious. I've noticed that she has been keeping Nick as close as possible lately.
Bottom line . . . Right now, everyone is in a transition phase. It's almost a tangible feeling in the air at our house. We're all poised and ready for some big and drastic changes that are just on the verge of happening. But they're the sort of changes that can't be rushed. (or avoided.) They will unfold in their own time and way. Until then, we just wait, try to prepare, and hope for the best. Hopefully, it won't be too much, all at one time, and we will be able to catch our second wind in between events. I know that's my biggest fear.
With my luck, Roy's surgery will end up being scheduled for the same day that the kids go back to school, and then, Jen will go into labor on the same day. Or, what if, God forbid, any or all of the above have complications? When you're part of this family, you learn that complications are an every day occurrence. I know that I shouldn't allow myself to think that way. But every day we spend waiting, it becomes a more likely possibility. I know that I don't really have any control over any of it. I just have to have faith that whatever happens, I can deal with it, without holding myself responsible for it all.
Okay, I need to sleep.
Posted by Auburn~haired~artist at Friday, August 07, 2009
Tuesday, August 4, 2009
What a day! I feel like I've been running all over town and haven't had five minutes to stop and think.
I started out with my Doctor appointment for my regular Diabetes check. The doctor was running behind and I had to wait for an hour to be seen. Then, he tells me that he wants to biopsy this little knot on my shoulder that I've had forever. Whatever, why not? So I have to go back next week for that. What fun !
Finally, I headed to the grocery store around 12:30 PM. Not a good idea to go to the grocery store when you've been fasting for blood work at the Dr.s office right before. It's an even worse idea to take two teenagers along with you ! I ended up spending almost $400.00 and filling TWO shopping carts! It took forever just to get it all bagged and loaded into my mini van.
I only had and hour left to get it all home, put away, and to get Jake to his Dr.s appointment at 3PM. So, I go to start the car and guess what? The dang battery is dead !!!! It's 100 degrees outside, I have a car load of frozen food melting in the sun, I haven't eaten all day, and my blood sugar is dropping, as my blood pressure is rising. So I grab the cell phone and a chocolate bar and start screaming at my husband who is in Liberty, MO. (at least a 45 minute drive away)
Thankfully, Nick and Jen were just down the street at the Library and they showed up to give me a jump start before I had $400.00 worth of liquid groceries all over my van.
We got home, unloaded, and I had just enough time to get the cold stuff put away before Jake's appointment.
As an obsessive/compulsive neat freak, it took all the strength I could muster to walk out the door leaving all the dry goods, canned goods, and everything in between, laying all over my kitchen table and counters. Fortunately, Heather decided to stay behind to make sure that my dogs didn't eat all the unattended food.
I was supposed to drive Jake to Jasmin's house after his appointment, so that He could go to a concert with Christian tomorrow; but Roy finally showed up and drove him for me, so that I could finish up in my kitchen.
By the time I had everything put away, it was time to cook dinner. When everyone was fed, the dishes done, and the kitchen cleaned, (again) the sun had just started setting, and I had promised my dogs that I would walk them when the sun went down. I know it sounds crazy, but when I tell them that I will walk them later, they seem to understand and hold me to my promise, because they all started doing their pre-walk doggie dance as soon as I turned out the kitchen lights.
It was still 88 degrees outside, but at least the sun wasn't scorching the pavement anymore. Heather helped me walk them, but by the time we finished up, it was 10PM, and my clothes were soaked with perspiration.
I threw some food in their dog bowls, jumped in the shower, and here I am - FINALLY.
I am exhausted. Every part of me hurts.
Thank God Mondays only happen once a week.
Good night all.
Posted by Auburn~haired~artist at Tuesday, August 04, 2009