Saturday, July 26, 2008

Enough !

Hey there,

Ah, another Friday night, another week survived. Looking back, this has been kind of a crappy week, I'm actually glad that it's over. With the exception of Wednesday, when I went to the doctor, I somehow managed to accomplish . . . absolutely nothing. For the most part, it's been a lot of useless drama.

Sunday, My husband and I were supposed to go to the Dinner Theater for an afternoon show. Even though we were going with a lot of other people, it was supposed to be a time for Roy and I to be together as a couple. Instead, Roy wanted to do an all night fishing trip with Nick the night before, so I ended up going with Jasmin. It really wouldn't have been a big deal except, as I've mentioned before, Roy and Nick together, just isn't a good idea. I hate being right. All those years of sobriety, all those years of struggle that came before, are being forgotten. It's been that way ever since Nick turned 21. To be honest, Nick has to learn every thing the hard way, so his behavior isn't much of a surprise; but Roy, he's old enough to know better, he's just being stupid. I am NOT going down that road again, not with Roy, it's bad enough dealing with Nick's stupidity. I spent all of Monday and Tuesday making that clear to him. He says, that he gets it but, talk is cheap, he's going to have to prove it.

Of course Wednesday was all about dealing with Doctors, lab tests and setting appointments. Thursday is when Nick and his "girl friend" decided to upset everyone. As of this evening, Jennifer is supposed to go back home to her parents house, so I am praying that all that craziness is over and done.

This afternoon, Heather and I had an appointment so go see Jasmin to get our hair done. That was supposed to be a "girls thing," but 15 minutes before we left, Nick called. He needed to be picked up from work, and he wanted to go with us to have Jas give him a haircut too. I told him that we were planning on having cuts and color done to our hair, and we would be at Jasmin's for at least 3 hours, but he insisted on going with us. He was bored, cranky, and bitchy the whole time, so it really wasn't much fun. I really hate seeing how much drinking has changed him. Nick used to be so positive and happy. Now, all he does is complain and sulk. It's just becoming so obvious that he has a lot of anger and resentments that he needs to deal with. There are times when I feel like I don't even know who this person is. But there isn't much I can do until he decides that he's sick of it.

Anyway, we got through it, and Jas did a great job with our hair, but it feels like it's been a horribly long day, and I'm exhausted. I've felt that way all week. I think that I'd have more energy, if I had cleaned the house top to bottom, and worked my ass off. It's the stress, the emotions, and the constant drama that kicks my ass.

I've had enough for one week. I'm going to go to bed and sleep until I wake up - hopefully, next week will be better. Good night.

Love,
Susan

2 howled back:

SPARSELY KATE said...

Next week will be better, I have a good feeling about this!
I'm sending you some peace and quiet and calm ;) actually, I do have a card to send you that made me laugh when I saw it because it really sums up the roller coaster of life with kids ( and husbands and ex-husbands!)

Thinking of you,

love mel

Cat said...

I wish you a better this week!